I’ve just read in “DER SPIEGEL” plus and I have to borrow it….
I already follow most of the rules, but as with all people, there is still room for improvement.
Greeting, smiling, listening: it’s so easy to be polite.
1. Write legibly; for this, it can be worthwhile to try out the handwriting regularly.
2. Speak clearly so that you can be understood, especially on your mobile phone and during video calls (this now includes perfectly functioning technology).
3. When speaking and especially when thanking, you make eye contact and look the other person in the eye.
4. When greeting, shake hands, but not too long, not too soft, not too firm; good friends and family members are hugged (if that’s okay with them).
5. If you carry a backpack, you should be careful where you swerve.
6. In the cinema or theatre, you walk through the rows in such a way that you don’t press your butt in anyone’s face.
7. A read chat message (WhatsApp, SMS, Signal, etc.) must be answered within an hour if possible – even if it is only by saying “I’ll get back to you later” (but then actually report later).
8. At parties where you don’t know many people, avoid political topics such as AfD, gender, “lateral thinkers”; the same is true of sickness, infirmity, death; and don’t show your Instagram stories around, it’s embarrassing.
9. In the event of death, do not send pre-printed condolence cards, but personal messages – preferably a handwritten letter.
10. Dress appropriately for the occasion, for example, in a church, a courthouse, in a cemetery covered and plain.
11. At the Bayreuth Festival, there is no clapping after the first act of “Parzival”.
12. Two keys open each heart, two cute, small, shiny; be careful not to lose them, they are called: Please and Thank You.
13. It is considered good manners to be able to converse even among strangers; be interested in the topics your interlocutor offers, listen carefully and ask meaningful questions.
14. Don’t kick anyone out of a chat group without being asked and without cause; nor do you simply add people to groups without being asked and indiscriminately.
15. When you apologize to someone, look them in the eye.
16. During meals, the mobile phone is taboo; nor does it have any place on the table.
17. Smacking and any other kind of body noise other than speech is to be avoided as far as possible in the presence of others.
18. Take off or take off your headphones when talking to others; It is best not to wear headphones or in-ears in the presence of others.
19. Always tip appropriately – not only in the restaurant, but also on delivery services, in the taxi or the service staff at the hotel.
20. Appointment times must be respected; Don’t make anyone wait more than five minutes or call and let them know if you’re running late.
21. You don’t sneeze and cough into the palm of your hand, but into your elbows.
22. Enclosed rooms must be ventilated regularly, preferably by intermittent ventilation.
23. You shouldn’t talk loudly on public transport (“I’M SITTING ON THE TRAIN RIGHT NOW”).
24. Don’t make fun of meat-eaters or vegetarians; Just don’t make fun of anyone.
25. Don’t send voice messages that last longer than thirty seconds; In general, voice messages should be avoided if possible, as you can never know if they can be listened to.
26. Don’t look at your phone all the time when you’re out for a walk – especially if you’re accompanied by someone.
27. Don’t film strangers without their permission (whether it’s at the gym, yoga class, on public transport, or on the street) and don’t post videos of others online without their permission.
28. In queues, you don’t moan or complain to other people waiting that things aren’t going well; You wait.
29. Do not date others and do not go to school, university or work if you have an infection; if you are sick, you are sick and stay at home.
30. Don’t have conversations with your inner child in public; Nobody wants to hear that.
31. Do not help yourself to the food of the person sitting next to you without being asked; Not even if you’ve known him or her for a long time.
32. Do not keep the litter box in the guest toilet.
33. Don’t point bare fingers at people who are dressed; even if you wear gloves, pointing at others is to be avoided.
34. Take off your sunglasses when you’re indoors and talking to someone (unless you’re Heino).
35. Don’t wear a tracksuit to school, work, or university (unless you’re a professional athlete).
36. Don’t write a love letter with ChatGPT; As a matter of principle, ChatGPT does not allow personal or creative correspondence to be handled.
37. Spelling rules also apply in chat messages; WhatsApp is not a punctuation-free space.
38. Don’t just go to stores to look and check prices and then order cheaper online.
39. Don’t write things about others on social media or chat that you wouldn’t say to their faces.
40. Don’t use capital letters in emails and chats and use exclamation marks sparingly, OTHERWISE IT WILL LOOK LIKE YOU’RE SCREAMING!!
41. If you see acquaintances, greet them; Arrivals greet those present, hosts are greeted first.
42. Even chats (e.g. in Microsoft Teams) are started with a short greeting before you write to the other person what you want in front of them.
43. In video conferences, turn on the video so you can be seen, but turn off the microphone when you’re not speaking so they can’t hear you and your background noise.
44. Don’t participate in video conferences when you’re lying in bed, sitting on the toilet, lying in the bathtub, or emptying the dishwasher.
45. Most cell phones have an answering machine; take the time and write a personal announcement on it.
46. Don’t go to multiple parties in one evening just for fear of missing out; Don’t cancel a party just because it hasn’t really gotten going after 60 minutes.
47. Don’t send chain letters, bulk text messages, or bulk messages on WhatsApp; not even on New Year’s Eve.
48. Don’t ignore others just because they gender or don’t gender; listen kindly to all people and think your part.
49. Always be at least as nice to office assistants as you are to the doctor.
50. Keep the designated area on the platform free for people with reduced mobility, make room for older people on buses or trains, and help young parents when they want to carry a stroller up or down the stairs.
51. Language is for everyone and serves to communicate; don’t use too many slang words or abbreviations that no one outside your bubble understands.
52. Since Corona at the latest, you should know that and how you wash your hands regularly; and of course you shouldn’t poop or touch your face unnecessarily.
53. Do not address young women as “Misses”; Mr. Waiter« is no longer possible.
54. Turn off the TV and computer when someone comes to visit (unless you’ve arranged to watch TV or play games together).
55. Don’t ask others about their body weight and don’t talk about your own; Body shaming is out.
56. Nobody likes people who moralize medically (“Too much sugar is unhealthy” / “But you know what happens to your body when you eat it, don’t you?”).
57. Do not devalue or insult others in conversation; not in one-on-one conversations and certainly not when you meet in a group.
58. After a one-night stand, you get back in touch within 24 hours; Even if both agree that it will stay that way.
59. Don’t send pictures of your child in the potty or in the bathtub; and you don’t take pictures of other children without being asked; children also have a right to privacy.
60. Confirm appointment requests and stick to them so that others can plan too; don’t trouble others by constantly postponing appointments.
61. Treat every person with respect; it is grossly rude to ask trans people about their motivation or to say in conversation with foreign-looking people: “Where are you from?” – “From Dortmund” – “No, no, I mean originally”.
62. Wait to eat until everyone at the table has something on their plate.
63. Don’t share photos of others without being asked.
64. If you’re giving something away, take off the price tag or stick it over; Don’t give away anything that is obviously so expensive that you put the recipient to shame with it.
65. Photographing your own food in the restaurant for Insta is a no-go; not only when others at the table are still waiting for their food; Cell phone gone!
66. Don’t go to yoga or other dates where you get very close to others without a shower.
67. Don’t look at others’ phones on the bus or subway or read their newspapers or books.
68. Be considerate of your fellow human beings and neighbors and avoid noise between 10 p.m. and 7 a.m.; this includes loud music as well as shouting.
69. If you ever write a book, thank the editor as well as friends, family and acquaintances who have supported you.
70. Never use the fountain pen of one or another without being asked.
71. Don’t drag out parents’ evenings unnecessarily with personal anecdotes (“yes, so my Elli didn’t like the rice pudding at all last week…”).
72. Borrowed items should always be returned and handled with care.
73. I’m sorry, dear German holidaymakers: You don’t block sunbeds with a towel, you don’t queue up in two queues at the same time and you don’t dawdle at the security check at the airport.
74. When you offer help to someone, be as specific as possible (“You’re sick. Do you want me to shop for you?«); and then implement your offer if it is accepted.
75. Don’t answer messages and inquiries with just one word.
76. Whoever stands in front of a closed door knocks and waits to be invited in before he or she enters.
77. When you receive something – even if it’s a business card – you should take a quick look at it appreciatively before you put it in.
78. The mobile phone ringtone should be set as discreetly as possible and not too loud; no roaring lions and no trombone choir, please.
79. On the escalator, stand on the right and overtake on the left if you are in a hurry; with a casual “excuse me”.
80. Don’t bump into anyone and dodge before a collision occurs; Do not behave aggressively towards others and in public in general, and do not become abusive.
81. To the question, “How are you?” you may answer honestly; but please not with a medical bulletin.
82. When a child misbehaves in public, one smiles softly at his or her mother or father and does not shake one’s head in exasperation.
83. When a neighbor or an acquaintance is hospitalized or dies, help is offered to the relatives; No matter how busy you are.
84. Intervene when parents yell at their children in public or become physically abusive.
85. Let other kids write off at school and share your cheaters.
86. If you have stayed with friends, acquaintances or relatives, you strip the guest bed or sofa to save the host work.
87. Separate your garbage; and sometimes roll the neighbor’s trash can off the street when the garbage collection was there.
88. Don’t insist in conversations and don’t demand an answer if you notice that someone doesn’t want to say something.
89. Do not emphasize in front of others how great you are yourself, your own children or parents; but also don’t complain loudly in front of others about yourself or family members.
90. If a car stops, you offer help to push it to the edge; You certainly don’t honk your horn or insult those who have been left lying down.
91. If you write bad reviews on the Internet, you have to write good ones.
92. Be polite to others – including children, but not intrusive; Don’t pet strangers’ children without being asked, and certainly don’t touch someone else’s baby bump (or other body parts of strangers) without explicit permission.
93. Respect the boundaries of others and do not push them to do something in particular.
94. Don’t describe other people about outward flaws (“the one with that fat pimple on their face”).
95. Don’t disappear behind your phone or computer screen when you’re in a room with others; modern communication technology brings us close to the people who are far away, but far away from the people who are close to us.
96. Moralizing is not appropriate (“Waaaas, you’re going on vacation?”).
97. Don’t criticize the tastes of others – whether it’s music, books, movies, art, food, or the like.
98. Don’t comment on the bodies, missteps, or body noises of others.
99. Don’t make anyone aware of educational gaps, let alone make fun of them.
100. Don’t tell others what to do (for example, by giving them a list of good manners).
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